Piloting This Ship

I’ve made a lot of mistakes in my life, and some have been really dumb but if there’s one mistake I’m proud to have never made was that never, not even once did I ever let other people run my life for me.

People and circumstances will influence a lot of my actions but ultimately, this is my life. Whatever thing I did, I will take full responsibility. I will not make decisions and then blame things and people – my parents, my heritage, my race, my… whatever. I mean, while all these things have been factored in, my decisions are still MY decisions. The cowardice that has stopped me from doing things was my cowardice, but in the same vein, my bravery was all mine too. Full accountability in both the good and the bad.

I still whine about the bad cards I’ve been dealt with. I still wish I had it better – I wish I was richer, smarter, and had a better upbringing for example, but if I had the sense to spot the flaws with which I was brought up, I figured I would also have the sense to change things in my life, including myself, for the better. And then accept the things I couldn’t.

Ah, life’s becoming weirdly difficult to pilot the older you get.